More About Having Babies in MX

My new niece, Karen Yaretzy, was born yesterday afternoon. She and my sister-in-law are both healthy and recovering at a hospital in Guadalajara. Karen Yaretzi is downright adorable. She has curly, dark hair, like her parents, and big cheeks. Her stats: 3.4 Kilos (~7 and a half pounds), 52 cm (~20.5 inches).

So much for the “huge” baby the doctors had been saying would require a cesarean. That’s just about as average as you can get for weight and length.

My sister-in-law did have her baby by cesarean. It seemed likely from the outset, since they’d been telling her from the beginning she would probably “need” one, and since they’re just so common down here. I didn’t get any details with which I could decide whether or not I agree the c-section was necessary, not that it matters to anyone else that I agree. I know my sister-in-law was hoping to have the baby naturally. Maybe it’s not a bad thing – after all they both seem to be doing relatively well. Still, it leaves me with an unpleasant feeling that this was just another routine surgery for her doctor, that her wishes weren’t respected. It’s hard to say. I’ve become very suspicious.

Visiting them in the hospital was really nice, it was coo-a-rific, but I’m doubly certain now I don’t want to be having my baby there. Having to look at a newborn through a glass window is somehow incredibly frustrating to me. I just kept thinking that someone really ought to be holding that baby, namely her parents - though I would do in a pinch. Seeing the babies lined up in cribs, having to wait for “visiting hours”…it just doesn’t make any sense to me.

My sister-in-law hadn’t breastfed yet, about 24 hours after the birth, because she hadn’t showered yet and was “dirty” from the labor. That almost made me go apeshit on everyone, until I decided that it wasn’t my fight. I’m not close enough to my sister-in-law to butt in like that. She said she was planning on breastfeeding, but I don’t know how important it really is to her. I have to separate my own mommy goals from my sister-in-law and niece. It’s hard to do, since I’m nearly ready to pop myself.

I’m not great at being a bitch (an invitation for “um…yeah you are!” comments.), but I think this is really the time for it. I’m not about to be pressured into a c-section for the convenience or monetary gain of someone else. And waiting for “visiting hours” to see my own baby is just out of the question.

Maybe it’ll be easier to harness the bitch because it’s almost expected. The worst behavior from a laboring woman is tolerated, even as she might get dismissed. Of course, in the end, it isn’t even bitchiness to demand certain things like laboring where you want and getting to cuddle your baby afterwards. It’s just one way to call a woman who is determined to get what she wants.

Still, it’s a convenient and motivating term, so I’ll run with it.

I think I’m in a good situation to get what I want – mostly because I do feel so determined, but also because Hernan absolutely has my back on this, and our birth center, doctor and doula seem so dedicated to natural birth and to respecting the wishes of the mother. We feel so lucky to have found them. If we hadn’t, I don’t think I’d have this baby in Mexico.