Mama says Moooooo

Apparently my face looks like one giant boob and my nose is the nipple. I say this because my baby keeps trying to suck milk out of my nose. I know he's after milk because he doesn't suck my nose the way he sucks on his toys (and "toys" here should be understood as anything he can manage to put in his mouth). No, he sucks on my nose while making his little desperate grunting/whimpering sound that he does whenever he wants to nurse.

Sometimes he changes his mind, though, and decides that since no milk comes out of my nose, it's probably my chin that's the nipple. I never thought my chin resembled a nipple, but I suppose we could say I never looked closely enough. Occasionally, my mouth gets targeted, too. Or the fatty part of my upper arm (the "marm", if you will). Or my stomach when he comes across it. Even my knee, it would seem, sufficiently resembles a milk source. He makes his little grunting/whimpering "gimme milk!" sounds and starts sucking on my knee. I try to tell him it's never going to happen. Milk will never come out of my knee. He doesn't listen.

It appears I'm a walking udder in the eyes of my son.